‘Old School will never go out of fashion’
Isn’t it weird that we – ‘the smartest of their kind beings’ are evolving at a prolific
rate much similar to the rise of intolerance in our nation and yet somehow at the same time are doing away with the ‘charm’ of our lives gradually.
I mean – the old school romance and relationships!
Give it a thought- Sir Darwin claimed- ‘Survival of the fittest’ but I’m sure he did not want it to be a life devoid of love and compassionate relationships. You might label me as a pessimist and also accuse of taking up a cliched issue to make a blog post but I can’t help but put some frantic attention to this.
The only thing that bodes well with the ongoing trend is Flings and Flings. You may claim to be friends with people who are happily committed for 3-4 years but –deep down inside they too are just together and stagnant, waiting for a turn in their fortunes- be it professional or romantic to make a move. Frankly, they are probably the last specimens of Test Cricket when all that’s happening around is T-20 cricket.
I know people who have been single all life and itching to make a upstart and then there are people who have had a dozen of casual flings and are looking for more- and Boom – these two sets of people match evenly making an instant pair.
There are couples still out there who are cut above the rest and are fighting their battles to sustain their future together and fighting off the
fuckboys/fuckgirls. I adore them and I too am privileged to know few of them.
In fact, in this context – I would love to illustrate a great example.
I was in 3rd Standard and my sister in 8th and we go back home on our bicycles. There was this boy X and girl Y – who were my sister’s classmates whom I used to observe, the boy used to be the typical lover boy always being around his girl and dropping her home every day and doing all the cute romantic stuff and my sister would narrate me stories of their love tale. Years passed by, my sister was no longer friends with them as we passed out of school. X as well as Y endured alternate careers in graduation and then also had their stints away from each other, saw innumerable nuisances being created in their families, had incomparable success post-graduation and all this while they stuck with each other – Like the tales typically celebrated by Shakespeare and the great writers.
And fast forward to 15 years, news broke out that X and Y are about to marry and they invited all their high school teachers, acquaintances and my sister as well.
That day, I believed in relationships and love in spite of the examples set in today’s scenario.
And this stubbornness to find a way to stick together, selflessly, respecting each other’s decisions and failures and still standing strong would make any relationship great – be it two friends or two siblings or even a parent-sibling duo.
You need to invest time, effort and patience and give the other person the freedom of space to last long. Technology and opportunities to hook up with random people (read Tinder) have spectacularly opened up new spaces but have also increased the pool to such a large extent that no one person tries to stay focused on one for too long.
The insecurities in those blue ticks, or the Best friends being too nice or one person trying to impose opinions on the other have sucked out the air out of the relationships.
For once go back to the even 10-15 years from now, love and friendship
was so innocent and selfless, I bet each one of us can recall the friends and
the ‘girl’/’boy’ friends we made at school and smile incessantly.
Letters expressed emotions so much better than emoticons and the
Babu/Shona/Darling in Whatsapp chats and videocalls.
Less of clicking cute selfies and more of making cute and sweet memories.
You would not bump into the other person every now and then like
you do today.
The more you anticipate, the more you long, the more you treasure
a person or their existence in your life.
We could do much more than asking for casual sex and intimacy as a dire necessity for a relationship to work out for real. All that is superficial and none of it can even come close to touching our souls.
Commitment and time are the two sole things that would make any person in the world willing to be beside you as a partner or a friend. Even Friendzone is such a big zone these days that people prefer to be assholes than being put into that zone.
But as our movies portray (though I don’t follow them) – the first step is always knowing each other and not flings every now and then or those Friends with Benefits deals. If it seems to be working, it runs out of gas pretty soon.
I sound pretty critical and too philosophical for a person who is not much into love or relationships.
But yeah, I can claim that making friends or approaching a girl back in the old days was way more soothing and relaxing without the fear of being judged or feeling out of the league. It is more about the glam, abs, the hot figure, the repute and the satisfying things people can bring into your daily life.
Nevertheless, it doesn’t refute my sad awakening of the lack of old school romance and trust and the longevity of any kind of relationships around. Probably, man was made to be this way – Mean, Hungry and Manipulative.
But just in case, I would come across a person whom I feel the urge to go and ask out and express my intentions to know, spend time and make the person feel worthwhile- I shall keep looking around because single life might save a bit of money, but you lose out on a big aspect of life!